Here we are in day one of a six day lockdown.

It’s heading for 35 degrees and the place has gone mad. Within two hours of the announcement yesterday Dan Murphy (booze) was cleaned out as were most supermarkets.

While Adolf was picking up his modest supply, some dick was wandering around the store coughing and muttering ‘covid.’ At Costco in Perth one couple parked in the trolley bay and crawled out through the window. Another couple simply stopped in the car park thoroughfare, popped the bonnet, tuned on the hazard lights and went off shopping.

Which all goes to show, when you want to show an Aussie an arsehole, give him a mirror.

Why do people rush out and buy a hundred rolls of toilet paper?

This lockdown was caused by a quarantine hotel guard testing positive for the new Pommie version. The bloke was a private security guard and Uber driver and KFC walloper.

The guard worked on the same floor as an active case of the UK mutant strain. Picture: Matt Jelonek/Getty Images

It’s a repeat of the Victorian fiasco in which the use of troops was declined because the Union wanted the jobs for it’s dumbarse members. With thousands of teachers twiddling their thumbs on full pay, you’d think they could have been drafted.

Maybe they aren’t intelligent enough for this kind of work.