… designed to cater to the Susies of the world, and then act surprised when people who don’t fit that mold can’t function. Putting the Susies in charge, tragically, contrary to giving them fulfillment, have made them miserable along with everyone else. Deep down, the Susies of the world don’t want to live in their own strict, conformist world, but the exciting wonderland of Calvin.

That’s a quote from a great SubStack article, Calvin vs. Susie, about the classic cartoon, Calvin & Hobbs, in which the writer talks about his love of the cartoon and how his boys have picked up on it thirty years after his childhood reading. He explores the various characters and their differences and interactions with Calvin, along with his view of the world and how all this corresponds with how we raise boys today:

Elders understood that giving rambunctious children room for adventure that channels into productive ends later in life, whether it be the military, exploration, or entrepreneurism. Most admins once understood they didn’t ask about hazing rituals to enter a group as long as it didn’t get out of hand. They once knew to turn a blind eye to whatever partying the boys were doing in the woods as long as they drove sober. They once understood the balance between being socially acceptable and stifling the passion and energy of young men…
…
In a way, the comic showed the stark realities of being a young boy trying to find his way. He is surrounded by types like Susie Derkins, who can’t help but be Susie Derkins. The real failure happens in the men who should have been there for him, channeling his energies toward finding a place in the world,

The writer does not denigrate Susie Derkins but makes the point that the world today is almost entirely set up for people like her and not Calvin:

Susie has more of the qualities modern culture desires. She is an obsessive rule-follower, academic, follows all the social mores, and has aspirations to enter a respectable profession. Her only wish is to fit into the current mold of wider society.
…
She loves school because she loves the accolades she receives from authority figures. Her aspirations, whether they are having kids or being a girl-boss, are catered to and considered mature. Whenever she gets harassed by Calvin, authority figures immediately swoop in to defend her. It’s not her fault the world she was born into gave her more advantages and comfort, and there’s nothing wrong with her taking advantage of it. She’s just in a protective bubble, and has no understanding of what is required to keep her small world turning.

But the truth is that they need eachother – and our culture needs them to need eachother. I think we’ve got one that doesn’t think that.

Related: The anti-anxiety experiment: Friends without phones, adult-free camping:

The kids locked their smartphone in a kSafe time-lock container, which could be set to release for just one hour a day…None of the teens suffered from anxiety or depression. The boys played sports. The girls had busy extracurricular schedules. All had parents who limited their screen time.

The boys spent most of their screen time on Snapchat, Spotify and watching YouTube clips of football and basketball games. They occasionally post or comment on social media, but feel no pressure.

The girls she recruited felt lots of pressure.

“You’re stuck, because if you do escape, you’re classed as a weirdo, and you’ll fall behind on trends, you won’t understand what people are talking about.…There’s no escape, because your social popularity is totally linked to your social media. So if you don’t post, you get made fun of. But then if you lip-synch to the wrong song on TikTok, you get made fun of for the rest of the year.”