No Minister

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Stuff you are appalling

I read stuff most days because I like their daily morning and afternoon quick quizzes and have a daily competition with my son as to who scores best. As a result I read a few articles most days and from time to time get the urge to comment – rarely are my comments posted – except for sports articles where probably 90% are.

This morning they had one penned by a Daniel Dunkley entitled `Why our water reforms need to go further’.

Obviously Dunkley is a green as his article focuses on Nitrates from farm fertiliser being the problem and in my view the article did not go anywhere near dealing with what causes water pollution throughout the country.

As they had comments open I penned a comment pointing out the article was misleading and that the vast majority of farmers were very conscious of the need for clean water because it affected their livelihood. I further suggested his article should take into account water pollution from towns and cities as well.

My post got an offensive wording warning but when I looked it over I only saw direct suggestions, no bad language or innuendo so I submitted it at about 8.30am – not showing so obviously deleted. Interestingly there were three other comments showing two of which were along similar lines to mine – they have now disappeared.

Among other things stuff advocate – and this is copied from their page:

`We believe in freedom of speech and in the importance of everyone having a say in a healthy democracy. We aim to give you the whole picture to help you form your own view of the world.

I say bullshit to that.

Written by pdm1946

February 25, 2021 at 10:39 am

Posted in New Zealand

Best Ever West Indian Test Cricket Eleven

What talent to choose from and some truely great players have missed out. The West Indians have a role in New Zealand’s cricket history through being the opposition in New Zealand’s first test win at Eden Park in 1956 but, it was on their Australian Tour in 1961 that they first really came to my attention – remember the first ever tied test in Brisbane. Then of course in the late 70’s and early 1980’s they dominated world cricket under the captaincy of Clive Lloyd, with a strong batting line up and a battery of fast bowlers.

Have a look at my best ever team:

  1. Gordon Greenidge
  2. Conrad Hunte
  3. George Headley
  4. Everton Weekes
  5. Viv Richards
  6. Garfield Sobers
  7. Jeffrey Dujon
  8. Joel Garner
  9. Michael Holding
  10. Wesley Hall
  11. Lance Gibbs

George Headley, known in his day as `the black Bradman’ would be Captain with Roger Harper 12th Man.

It says much for the West Indies that batsmen Brian Lara, Clyde Walcott, Clive Lloyd, Frank Worrell and Rohan Kanhai did not make the cut and nor did bowlers Andy Roberts, Malcolm Marshall, Sonny Ramadhin, or Alf Valentine. They also had the equivalent of our Rodney Redmond with VH Stollemeyer scoring 96 in his only test innings, as it was 1939 obviously the second world war curtailed his cricketing career.

I have seen the West Indies play twice – the first time against a North Island X1 at Napier in the late 60’s and again when they played India at the Basin Reserve in the 1992 World Cup. In Napier Seymour Nurse scored a hundred plus and it was Clive Lloyds first West Indies tour I believe.

Have you seen them.

Written by pdm1946

February 20, 2021 at 5:22 am

Posted in Sport.

Bloody Dangerous Idiots – All Three

Yesterday mrspdm decreed that she and I would travel to Napier from our Hastings home because she had sighted a bargain in a store not represented in Hastings. Suffice to say we got said bargain from a store across the road she had spotted the bargain at – which did have a Hastings outlet – at a cost of $100 approx more than intended. But enough of our shopping exploits.

On our way back to Hastings along the Marine Parade (SH51) as we approached the passing lane from the Te Awa turn off (by Maraenui Golf Club) to the Awatoto Fertilser Works we came up behind three camper vans apparently travelling in convoy – splitting the campervans were a couple of private vehicles. This is where the idiocy happened and their speed as we caught them was about 85 to 90ks.

At the start of the passing lanes the front two campervans indicated and pulled into the right hand lane even though there were no vehicles ahead of them to pass. There they stayed while the two private vehicles overtook them using the left hand lane as did the third camper van.

I said to mrspdm bugger this and backed off a couple of hundred yards – it was an accident waiting to happen. I kept that gap until we turned off to visit relatives in Havelock North and they went on to Hastings.

In hindsight we should have *555’d them but were so mesmirised by the lunacy we did not think of it at the time.

Written by pdm1946

February 18, 2021 at 7:43 am

Posted in New Zealand

Best Ever England Test Cricket Team

There is plenty of talent to choose from here and I am sure a few of our pommy readers as well as regular commenters will have a view not only on the players I have picked but even more so on those I have left out.

My interest in English cricket started with the 1958 New Zealand tour and grew through the 1958/59 Ashes series in Australia. One of my first ever cricket books was Trevor Baileys Cricket Book which it is fair to say may have influenced the selection of a couple of the players in my team which in batting order is – apologies for the double spacing I couldn’t get rid of it:

1 Herbert Sutcliffe

2. Jack Hobbs

3. Walter Hammond

4. Joe Root

5 David Gower

6. Ian Botham

7. Alan Knott

8. Fred Trueman

9. Jim Laker

10. Alec Bedser

11. Jimmy Anderson

Hammond would be Captain and Derek Randell (Arkle) 12thMan

As far as players who missed out they are a dime a dozen but of the modern era Alistair Cook was close while in the bowlers Brian Statham lost out to Anderson and Frank Tyson and Derek Underwood were real contenders. Alan Knotts batting got him in ahead of Godfrey Evans and Bob Taylor because with Trueman at eight the tail looked a bit long.

Going further back I really do not know how good players like Wilfred Rhodes and Dr. Grace really were so have left them out but they were icons of the game in their time.

In fact I have in mind so many good English players I was tempted to name another eleven to play a trial test to finalise my best eleven.

Over to you now – who would you have.

Written by pdm1946

February 13, 2021 at 9:42 am

Posted in Sport.

A Mix Of Cricket Trivia

My post with a best ever Australian Cricket X1 elicited some sledges etc in the comments and they made me think of various characters, famous sayings and incidents over the years I have been playing and following cricket:

Yabba was an icon of the famous `hill’ at the SCG and the following is attributed to him although I see others have used it too. Frank Tyson, possibly the fastest ever English bowler was bowling to an Australian batsman whose name I don’t recall in the 1954/55 Ashes series – the batsman had played and missed at 5 or 6 balls in a row (8 ball overs in Australia in those days) when Yabba yelled – bowl him a piano Frank and see if he can play that.

Brian Johnson was one of several great English Commentators that were a part of my cricket listening life. The following two gems are attributed to him. He was commentating on a test match England v West Indies in the late 70’s or early 80s when he came out with this one – the bowler is Holding the batsmans Willey – Michael Holding WI bowling to Peter Willey E.

His second effort involves New Zealand great Glenn Turner playing for his County Worcestershire and facing England fast bowler Bob Willis, Warwickshire. Turner got hit in the abdominal protector area (box we called them) and went down as men do. Eventually he was restored to fitness and faced up to Willis again for Johnson to pick up the commentary with – Turner to face Willis, one ball remaining.

JR Reid was batting against India on the 1955/56 tour. According to Reid’s book Sword Of Willow Indian left arm spinner Gupte was pitching the ball about 18 inches to 2ft outside off stump and spinning it away – ball after ball making it nearly impossible for the NZ right hand batsmen to score off him. Reid decided to do something about it and make a point – Gupte bowled a ball and Reid never moved from his stance as the ball went through to the keeper.

Gary Bartlett was possibly New Zealand’s fastest ever bowler. He played in the late 50’s early 60’s but injury and an alleged suspect action limited his career – at his best he terrorised batsmen. Someone I played club cricket with told this story about him in a Hawke Cup match Marlborough v Wanganui. Bartlett hit a batsmen and while the batsman was being checked out Bartlett walked back to his mark and called – prop the bastard back up and I will knock him down again. Wouldn’t go down too well today.

Finally when I was in my high school first X1 we played in the local mens senior competition. In one game the opposing wicketkeeper appealed against the sun, we complained about their umpire smoking and their fast bowler clean bowled Ian (Nectar) Stevens (All Black) with an orange – I was umpire at the time.

Written by pdm1946

February 4, 2021 at 7:39 am

Posted in Sport.

The Pulpit Of Truth Has Moved

For almost a year Jacinda Ardern, Grant Robertson, Chris Hipkins, Megan Woods, sundry other Cabinet Ministers plus Ashley Bloomfield and his English lady offsider have been telling all of you who make up the team of 5million that the only source of Covid truth is what emanates from them at the Beehive.

Well Hone Harawira shot that down in a big way yesterday at about 5pm when he told Heather Du Plessis-Allen that there were two new confirmed community cases in Orewa. Hone was adamant that he had a number of impeccable sources who had confirmed this. So someone or some people in cabinet were leaking to Hone as were people in the higher echelons of the Health Ministry.

If I had to name a Cabinet Minister who might have told Hone I would say Willie Jackson.

So the Pulpit of Truth is now situated in Hones back yard and although it is early days look to him to milk this for all it is worth as a base for standing in the next election and turfing the inept Kelvin Davis from his seat.

Written by pdm1946

January 28, 2021 at 10:23 am

Posted in New Zealand

Jacinda Ardern declares 2021 ‘the year of the vaccine’

Well that is that buggered then!!!

The heading is a headline I have just seen on Stuff and immediately made me think of:

  • Kiwibuild – 10,000 houses .
  • The year of delivery

Based on past performance New Zealand is not going to see the Coronavirus Vaccine in 2021.

Written by pdm1946

January 21, 2021 at 11:58 am

Posted in New Zealand

Best Ever Australian Test Cricket Eleven

Seeing as a few people showed interest in my post on a best New Zealand Eleven I thought I would try my luck with an Australian team. My interest in Australian cricket started with the 1958/59 Ashes series but a number of the players I have selected were from before that time and they were great players I grew up reading about.

My team in batting order is:

  1. Bill Ponsford
  2. Bill Woodfull
  3. Don Bradman
  4. Greg Chappell
  5. Steve Waugh
  6. Keith Millar
  7. Alan Davidson
  8. Don Tallon
  9. Shane Warne
  10. DennisLillee
  11. Ray Lindwall

Bradman would be Captain and Norman O’Neil would be my 12 man..

There are a number of unlucky players in my mind – Neil Harvey, Ashley Mallet, Bobby Simpson, Clarrie Grimmett, Doug Walters, Mathew Hayden, Richie Benaud, Charlie McCartney, Rodney Marsh, Ricky Ponting to name a few – you cannot pick them all.

On form Steve Smith would have pushed hard for a place but hs ethics rule him out of my team. You could say the same about Greg Chappel but he did play within the rules of the game at the time.

Who would you have?

Any Australian views? Adolf doesn’t count because he is a New Zealander living in Australia.

Written by pdm1946

January 20, 2021 at 7:19 am

Posted in Sport.

Public Notice From Prime Minister Ardern

The Prime Minister has instructed me (if you believe that you will believe anything) to announce the dates she has chosen for the next Level 4 Covid lockdown for all of New Zealand.

Said lockdown will commence at 11.59am (why always that time – buggered if I know) on Tuesday 9 February 2021 and will conclude at 1.01am on Saturday 13 March 2021 (it would have been midnight but I wasn’t sure how best to write that).

Why those dates and that time frame you are all asking yourself. Well it is like this – on the 6 February she and Grant and Kelvin plus selected others from her Cabinet have to be on hand to cook Bacon, Pork Sausages and other succulent goodies on the breakfast barbie at Waitangi – the local Iwi all love her for that and it is a good way to hopefully secure the electorates Labour has up there and she does like to meet up with the Harawira family and be seen holding Titewhai’s hand.

On the 15th March she absoludley has to be in Christchurch at the Mosques to remember the atrocities of the Australian terrorist Brenton Tarrant (whose name will not pass her lips ever again) because despite her best efforts to delay things she had to miss that anniversary last year. She has made a note not to take the left over bacon and pork sausages with her to assist with any catering and she has Clark digging out her best headscarf and he will make sure that the Nannie irons it for her.

So team of 4,999,999 (I am not one of the 5 million) when you look at the calendar these are the only dates available in the Prime Ministers promotional schedule to hold a lock down and she wonders if one of you could let Saint Ashley know the dates it is going to happen. Don’t worry aboud TV1 and Newshub – she has already ordered them to make time available for her at 1pm every single day through the lockdown with repeats at 6pm, 7pm and 8pm to ensure no one but, no one misses them.

Written by pdm1946

January 15, 2021 at 8:15 am

Posted in New Zealand

With Age Comes Wisdom

Or is that commonsense?

My 96 year old uncle who lives in Havelock North regularly comes under pressure from his daughter who lives out of Christchurch to move south and go into care near her. There is some sense in that except he is in good health for his age and well able to look after himself with a little help from others like mrspdm and I. Plus he has lived in Hawkes Bay all of his life so a lot of people drop in on him. However over Christmas the daughter wore him down and he agreed to move south and go into the care home that she had found.

Yesterday mrspdm and I picked him up so he could see his GP for assessment. We did not go in with him and when he came out he told us that after a quick visit with his GP she passed him on to a Nurse who was to run some tests – one of which was a memory test and it is here he really showed his mettle. He was asked to remember and repeat the following:

Mr Jim Brown lives at 3 Church Street, Woodville, Hawkes Bay.

He did it word perfect except he stopped after Woodville so she said to him you missed a line could you repeat it please, so he did again in exactly the same way with the same result. After the third `failed’ time she said to him she said you keep missing Hawkes Bay.

His response – Woodville is not in Hawkes Bay.

I think he nearly had to pick her up off the floor from what he told us.

The upshot was the Doctor apparently told him yes he should be in care while the nurse took the opposite view – it will be interesting to see the final outcome.

Written by pdm1946

January 12, 2021 at 11:00 am

Posted in New Zealand